JS: If ‘topkill’, the coolest sounding containment strategy didn’t work, what’d we do?

BP (vox pop): “This operation will involve taking a very clean cut with a diamond saw by the robots … this is being done at 5000ft with the robots”

JS: “We have underwater robots with diamond saws..?! And you went with that sixth? Because the robots with diamond saws - that sounds like the first fucking thing I’d try... ”

JS (mimicing voice): “Yeh, Agent Brown, it looks like filling a pipe there with garbage and mud didn’t work. You know, I was thinking, we’ve got these laser-guided diamond-saw robots, I was thinking maybe we should try those out?”

— Jon Stewart (The Daily Show) on BP’s attempts to stem the leak of oil in the Gulf of Mexico Watch